Women who are in abusive situations stay there for a variety of reasons. They are unable to support themselves (they think) and have no where to go, they have no support system, they blame themselves, they feel all alone, they think they can change him.
Today there are many places to turn, and it is often shame that keeps a woman in an abusive relationship. But there is also the possibility that she feels rewarded somehow by putting up with the abuse. He brings her flowers and other gifts after and episode. This is rare in my experience, but does happen. The woman must come to realize that the 'gifts' are just his way of smoothing the waters and easing his conscience.
Most often, she has done nothing to displease him except be there. Perhaps he had a bad day at work. But that was not her fault, and him punishing her for his problems is ludicrous. However, the woman must come to the conclusion that she does not deserve this abuse on her own. Friends can help by pointing thisout, or asking pertinent questions.
When a woman comes to the point of leaving she will need all the support she can get from friends and family. In extreme cases, there are shelters for battered women. They can be encouraged to seek any and all assistance available. Sometimes they are not aware of all the help that is available. Friends can be the resource that points her in the right direction.
